the glories of Vacation

"vacate": from Latin "vacare," to leave empty

And that is what I am, thankfully empty of any confusing or chaotic thoughts relating to Evelyn Waugh, Joseph Conrad, or how in the heck to please my professors. It's good. Breathe deeply....

Yesterday, my friend and I went up to Dallas just for fun. We took the day off of work, went shopping (not for Christmas), had drinks and dinner, and saw Slumdog Millionaires in a cute neighborhood. Also, we went to Starbucks on the way up there. A perfect day.

Sometimes I think I'm meant to live the life of leisure all the time, like an aristocrat of old, when they had no guilt complexes like we Americans do about spending time on relationships, art, or learning how to enjoy ourselves in ever-more-complex ways. It's so natural to me. Even the enneagram personality test says I am an "aristocrat" type.

Then I remember that women fought for the freedom to be employed and creative in the public sphere, and how Jane Austen wrote about the emotional dangers of idleness--most specifically depression and self-centered inanity. That's not what I want, but I'm convinced I would keep myself busy somehow.

School is hard. Not in the sense that most people's jobs are hard. It's just psychologically hard to expose your thoughts to critique and to be entering a profession that takes years of preparation and guarantees no stable employment upon graduation.

However, if I didn't do it, vacation wouldn't be so good. It wouldn't be so good to empty my mind. And it is a good feeling. It's also necessary for re-creation. Work and play, both good. "Seasons" are good, and balance is good. I need to remember to embrace both mental "vacation" and its opposite. Too much vacation might become too vacant, and I am incredibly fortunate to have the kind of employment I do. Career success isn't everything, but it's definitely something.